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Instead of Alyssa starting preschool on the 22nd, we have to move the schedule one week forward. I found out that Ate Raquel and Tatay will be staying with my other sister-in-law in Stanton one week before they go home to the Philippines. Terri, the Director of the school agreed for Alyssa to stay for 30 minutes at Chez Grand’mere (French for Granny’s House) on Monday to get used to the environment before we drop her off on Tuesday. I hope she will do good. You see, it will be the first time that we will leave her to complete strangers and I am a little skeptical. Not because I don’t trust the teachers but more because I am kind of scared for her. I feel sorry too that she has to go to school this early… I wish my Mom is here to take care of her.

They say there is a first time for everything… and in order for her to learn and grow, I have to let her go. It is all for the best. Being the only kid at home, she can be a brat. No, I don’t spoil her. But because she knows she can ran to someone else when I try to give her a time out is not much of a help. AGAIN, I am NOT blaming anybody else as a matter of fact I NEVER said it is anybody’s fault. To clarify things (even if you go back to my blog), I clearly wrote that: Alyssa behaves 100 times better with us. And that is the absolute truth. BECAUSE: 1. She knows whatever my decision is, it will Rolly’s too. So she cannot really run to him about something that I already did not agree on. 2. Because I am firm and she knows she does not have a choice but to follow.

And yeah, it is all natural that as a parent you get upset about words you hear. But I am not the type that would negate others instantly. I always try to retain a cool and calm composure, and I am good in masking what I feel. And though I don’t agree with what is being said, I rarely make any comments. I would not waste any of my time to even address it unless I feel it is necessary, or when I get pushed too hard. As I said, Alyssa is my business. She is not anybody’s daughter, she is mine. And I make decisions that will benefit her and not the other way around. That’s what parents are supposed to do. And I am blessed to have been given the best Mom and Dad myself. They’ve always been protective and loving, supportive and providing…

By the end of next week, I will introducing the new Alyssa. She will start learning more about life and friends and I know the first few days will be just too much for her. I wish I can be there inside her class, then again how can she start being independent. For now, I am just glad I work two blocks away from the center… It makes things better.